I have this problem with anger 

Or maybe frustration is a better word

Or despair

I feel it in my throat, and in my chest

Like when I realized I’d fucked up an audio project I was working on

And I said to my [[[husband]],

Almost yelling, as if it was their [[fault]],

I lost that clip, I don’t know where it went, I can’t get it back. I can’t believe I fucked this up. I could go back to the other file, but it was an earlier draft, and that wouldn’t fix it, not really. Why did I sign up for this class anyway? I could never be a podcaster, I don’t even like audio engineering, I don’t have a good voice, and people think I’m awkward, even though I’m not as shy anymore I’m too excitable, they think I’m a weirdo, I can’t believe I did this, I’m such an idiot, I left the ‘ripple edit’ option on and it fucked everything up, now I’ll never get it back, what should I do, no I can’t do that, but what should I do, no, nothing will work, it’s futile, I really fucked this up, what the fuck is wrong with me, [[what am I gonna do?]]